“The more you explain it, the more I don’t understand it.”
― Mark Twain

Navigating mixed messages is never easy. You hear one thing, start down a path, and suddenly you find yourself running in the opposite direction trying to keep up. It can be a high-stress situation that looks like a team of six-year-olds chasing a soccer ball.

So, how do we deal with this chaos? Like so many things in life, step up and lead.

1. Own the confusion. If the message is mixed, it’s your job to clarify it. Take the initiative to ask for specifics.

2. Repeat back what you heard. Say things like, “It sounds like you need…” or “It looks like you want…” etc. It’s okay to be wrong in your understanding. Your boss might say “Yes, exactly.” or “No, what I mean is…” Either way, you get the information you need to move forward.

3. Understand the cost of getting it wrong. E.g. “If she means X, I’ll do Y, but if she means Z and I do Y, that will be a problem.” This will help you address specific risks, and move forward in a rational way.

4. Manage your emotional response. When you feel like you’re receiving mixed signals, instead of immediately reacting, assess your emotions first. Make sure you’re in a good state to hear and understand the message even if the communication is poor.

There’s never a shortage of mixed messages, but they signal an opportunity to practice leadership. Embrace these moments as chances to grow and demonstrate your leadership skills, whether or not you hold a formal title. How you handle these situations sets the standard for everyone around you.