“Don’t let anyone define you. You define yourself.”
― Billie Jean King
Don’t let your birthplace define you.
Don’t let your parents define you.
Don’t let a job define you.
Don’t let laziness define you.
Don’t let failures and mistakes define you.
Don’t let fear and anxiety define you.
Don’t let doubt define you.
Don’t let pain define you.
Define yourself by your work, your effort, your drive, your energy, your resolve, and your hustle.
“I never learn anything by talking. I only learn things when I ask questions.”
― Lou Holtz
If you want to accelerate your learning:
“Time is the most valuable thing a man can spend.”
― Theophrastus
Being present to your family is the greatest gift you can give them.
No amount of thinking about your mom is worth as much as a 20-minute phone call. No amount of worrying about your kids is worth as much as an hour of real conversation. No amount of flowers or chocolates or diamonds is worth as much as taking your wife on a date.
Spend some time, put your phone down, and be fully present to the people closest to you.
“Put me in coach, I’m ready to play today.”
― John Fogerty, “Centerfield”
You can’t win a game you don’t play. It’s the same in chess, poker, and baseball. It’s true for copywriting, public speaking, and business, too. Watching from the stands doesn’t count. Standing on the sidelines won’t make any difference. Being a cheerleader isn’t enough. You need to get in the game.
So, what’s holding you back?
Maybe you don’t know the rules. No problem. You can learn them.
Maybe you think you don’t have the skills required. No problem. You can train.
Maybe you’re afraid to fail. No problem. If you fail, try again.
Get in the game. What’s the worst that can happen? Get on the field, play the game, learn, keep improving, and have fun.
“It’s not hard to make decisions when you know what your values are.”
― Roy E. Disney
If you ever get stuck in a neverending analysis paralysis loop, and can’t make a decision, try this:
For instance, if you’re shopping for a new sleeping bag, your top priority might be weight. Go with the lightest option. Or maybe your top priority is comfort. Choose the most comfortable sleeping bag.
Problem solved.
“Think excitement, talk excitement, act out excitement, and you are bound to become an excited person.”
― Norman Vincent Peale
Are you excited? Why or why not?
If you’re not excited, you’re probably bored.
Let’s forget about the boring and mundane. Paying the bills doesn’t excite anyone. Neither does browsing through Netflix for an hour in the hope of finding something interesting to watch. Find a way to minimize time spent on necessary tasks and eliminate unnecessary ones.
So, what would get you excited?
How about getting a shiny new laptop? Or maybe you could finally learn to play the guitar? What if you took a weeklong vacation? These would all excite a lot of people.
I’ll suggest a better approach. Focus on exciting experiences. Build a website over a weekend. Play the guitar for a campfire sing-along with friends. Spend a week in a national park.
Don’t worry if things go poorly. In the end, you’ll end up with a great story about your website of horrors, your off-key campfire choir, and how you learned to cook over a fire during a downpour.
“When the mathematician would solve a difficult problem, he first frees the equation of all incumbrances, and reduces it to its simplest terms. So simplify the problem of life, distinguish the necessary and the real.”
― Henry David Thoreau
Simplifying your life reduces anxiety and stress. It makes you seem like a superhuman compared to the people around you who are scrambling to keep up with self-imposed chaos.
Try these three tips:
“Some questions are like matryoshka dolls; once opened, new ones come out!”
― Mehmet Murat Ildan
The most important questions don’t always have direct answers. That’s fine. It means we need to ask ourselves more questions. If it truly matters, then it’s worth the trip down the rabbit hole.
For example, “What should I do?” requires more information. Who can help me? Why am I unhappy? When should I make a change? How do I achieve my dreams? All of these questions raise more questions.
If you want the answers, you need to dig deeper. It takes extra effort, and the process can force you to face reality in new and challenging ways, but don’t be satisfied until you find meaningful answers.
“Little things make big things happen.”
― John Wooden
When facing your everyday challenges, take a step back, shake things up for a moment, and reset your mind. The effect can seem almost magical.
If you have writer’s block, go for a walk.
If you need more ideas, take a shower.
If you want to slow down, play a game of chess.
If you lost your focus, meditate.
If you’re angry, frustrated, or depressed, give thanks for your blessings.
“Everything we know has its origins in questions. Questions, we might say, are the principal intellectual instruments available to human beings.”
― Neil Postman“Judge a man by his questions rather than by his answers.”
― Voltaire
A good FAQ page lets your customers or users find all the answers they need in one place. It lets you spend your time on more important matters than answering the same question repeatedly.
A personal FAQ list is a bit different. It’s a list is made up of the questions that you should ask yourself “frequently” to stay on track and keep growing. It helps you quickly push past obstacles and spend your time on actions.
Unlike a traditional FAQ, it doesn’t include the answers, because the answers change constantly. The key is to ask yourself empowering questions.
The questions and categories change over time. You should add, modify, or remove questions based on new insight and experience.
Here are some example categories and questions to get you started:
Start my day.
End my day.
I feel overwhelmed.
Make a decision.
I’m afraid to act.
Solve a problem.
Determine a course of action.
The project is complete or the event is over.
Something bad happened.
I’m frustrated or depressed.
